Meltdown City

I have been a social worker since I graduated with my Bachelors in Social Work in 2005. Throughout my career I have made it a point to teach my clients, and then when Lucas was born my children, how to talk about their feelings. When Lucas was 22 months old, I went into his room and I stopped him from throwing cars at the wall. He balled up his fists and started pushing me out the door. I told him that while it perfectly ok for him to feel angry with me, it is not ok for him to push me. He retorted with, "I don't wanna talk to you! My angry is too big!" He got mad when I burst out laughing.

About four months later we were in the Wal Mart (which is how most bad stories begin, right?). It was 5:00 on a Friday and I was tired from work and he had not taken an afternoon nap at daycare. Against my better judgment I ran there to get a few things anyway. He had a complete meltdown by the Pull Ups and I sat down on the floor next to him and said, "When you are done, we will keep going. It's your choice." He looked at me like I'd grown a second head, calmed down, and we went to check out. In the check out line he began to yell at me that he wanted gum. "No," I said, "You do not get to talk to me like that." He looked up at the ceiling and wailed, "I CAN'T MAKE A BETTER CHOICE! I'M TOO UPSET!!!!" .

At 3 Lucas was mad at me (although I do not recall about what) and yelled, "I need space!!! Please stop talking!" At 4 he had gotten corrected at school for not following directions and when I was talking to him about it when he got home he said, "I know I CAN do better. Sometimes I don't WANT to." Also at age 4 he had an argument with a friend in his preschool class. He came home and said, "I don't know what's up with him. He was in a bad space today."

I can't help but hope as he gets older he continues to try to put a voice to what he feels. If for no other reason that it makes me giggle.